Brown's Daily Word 9-26-07

Good Morning,
Praise the Lord for His audacious claims. He is the Resurrection and the Life . Those who believe in Him, though they die they shall live for evermore. During the last few weeks I have conducted several funeral services. I am reminded that life on earth is very short, and eternity is very long. Hell is real and heaven can be ours in and through Jesus Christ our Lord. Paul, who encountered the Risen Lord and was changed for ever, could say " for me to live is Christ and to die is gain". John Wesley said, "Christians die well". Jesus our Lord taught us how to live and how to die and how to live again.
Paul Harvey tells the true story of a lady who went to a newspaper to report the death of her husband. She took a glowing four page report to the obituary counter. Upon seeing it, the news clerk said, "Ma’am, you should know that it costs $.50 a word to put that in the paper." Stunned, the wife took it back and re-wrote it. It now said, "Sam Brown dies." The clerk said, "I’m sorry ma’am, but there’s a 7-word minimum.” The widow took it back & counting on her fingers wrote:"Sam Brown dies... ’88 Ford for sale."
We need to understand that, realistically, grief will not go away that quickly. Ecclesiastes 3:4 says: "There is a time to cry and a time to laugh, a time to grieve and a time to dance." The author of Psalm 116 went through the process of grief and was able to find comfort. Grief is defined as: "An involuntary emotion you experience when you lose something or someone that is valuable to you." Now, since it is involuntary we need to understand that grieving is not a sin. It is not wrong to express grief. In fact, it’s natural. Paul, a man who experienced loss, wrote in 1 Thessalonians 4:13- "We do not want you to grieve like other people who have no hope." He doesn’t say, "don’t grieve," but he does tell us, in your grief, remember to place your hope in God. Grief is an honorable emotion because it is borne out of love. You must grieve. Most commentators describe Psalm 116 as a “Psalm of Grief,” indicating that the writer either is or has been grieving. We are not sure of the exact circumstances but just look at some of the words he uses. Vs:3: "The danger of death was all around me; the horrors of the grave closed in on me; I was filled with grief and fear." Vs:10 he says, "I am completely crushed." So, the Psalmist was grieving, and although we don’t know specifically the cause of his mourning, we do know that grief can come in a variety of ways.
The most common grief is from the loss of a loved one. I believe this is the source of the Psalmist’s sorrow. In vs:15 he says, "How painful it is when one of the Lord’s people die." The loss of loved ones, especially if they are young or the death is sudden may be the hardest kind of grief, but it’s not the only source. The loss of possessions can cause grief. Just ask those who try to take their own lives when the stock market crashes or go into a hermit-like existence when their life savings are lost. The loss of health can cause grief. Soldiers that lose a limb or athletes who lose their careers due to injury certainly grieve over that loss. Some commentators feel that when the Psalmist says in vs:3 that "the danger of death was all around me," that maybe he was referring to his health. A loss of health can cause grief.
Maybe the clearest Biblical example of someone who lost all of these things is Job. Job was an upright, righteous man of God but he went through a series of tragic losses that may be unparalleled in human history. The late Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross wrote a ground breaking book in 1965, (I was in college), entitled On Death and Dying, in which she suggested a cycle of grief. That book is still widely quoted. However, today’s mental health professionals, when talking about grief, say that maybe a better word than “cycle” is the word “journey.” It is one with many twists and turns. But it’s important to understand that the grieving process is not some neat progression. A person may repeat a stage or skip one and go right into another.
Bob Russell, a preacher in Louisville, took a survey of those who have gone through the grieving process, and then gave 10 practical suggestions of "do’s" & "don’ts" to help you help someone who is grieving.
(1) Don’t avoid the person who mourns. We worry sometimes about, "I don’t know what to say." "I’ll feel so awkward at the funeral home." The worst thing we can do when someone is grieving is to do nothing.
(2) Don’t think you have to say the "right thing." These people said consistently that the person who helped the most was the close friend who was just there. sitting next to them or just close by them, just listening. The poet wrote- "When trouble comes your soul to try... You love the friend who just stands by... It helps somehow to pull you through, although there’s nothing they can do. But just to have a friend, whose sympathy endures until the end, gives a heart the fervent cry: ‘God bless the friend who just stands by.’"
(3) Don’t treat the survivor differently. For example, if you would of invited the couple to the party, then invite the widow or widower to the party.
(4) Do understand that the grieving process takes a long time. Be patient.
(5) Don’t think it’s necessary to bring it up every time you’re with them. Don’t say, "How are you really doing?" Don’t push.
(6) Do expect their emotions to fluctuate. The survivor is not always going to feel badly. Let them be happy, let them be sad, maybe all in a matter of moments.
(7) Do be willing to reminisce. Sometimes we think they won’t want to hear something about their loved one. But I know from experience that some of the things that brought my wife and I the most comfort after the death of her father were those who came up and said, "You know, one time Frank and I were.." -OR- "I remember how Frank used to love to teach.." Let them talk about the loved one.
(8) Do be personal in your remembrances. If you know something nice to say, say it. "O, you’re mother was so wonderful to me.” Your Dad’s strong faith was such an inspiration to me."
(9) Do keep your sense of humor. Don’t be flippant. But at the same time the Bible says, "A cheerful heart does good like medicine." (Prov. 17:22 LB) Vance Havner, a famous preacher, recalled when someone would come up to him after the death of his wife and say, "Sorry you lost your wife." He’d smile and say, "Well, don’t be.. after all something’s not lost, if you know its location! And I know right where to find her!" But remember, Prov. 14:13 also says: “Laughter can conceal a heavy heart; when the laughter ends, the grief remains.”(NLT) So, even though we should keep a sense of humor, don’t think that laughter means the pain is completely over.
10) And Do remember that the time you are needed most is not immediate. Oh, you need to be there from the start but everybody comes immediately. 6-8 weeks or 6 months later, when everyone else is gone, that’s when you’re needed most.
It is important that those going through grief understand the Lord offers some incredible resources to help heal. The Psalmist here mentions several.
(1) God promises compassion. Vs:5- Our God is compassionate." You are not going through your grief alone. Jesus knows how you feel because He’s been where you are. Hebrews 4:15 says: “We don’t have a priest (Jesus) who is out of touch with our reality. He’s been through weakness and testing, experienced it all - all but the sin.” God knows exactly how you feel and offers His compassion.
(2) God promises protection- Vs:6- "The Lord protects the helpless; when I was in danger, He saved me." Allow the loss, whatever it is, to draw you into deeper dependence on Him. Cry out to Him.. He’s there for you, protecting you, holding you. Heb .13:4- “God assures us, “I’ll never let you down, never walk off and leave you.”(MSG)
(3) God promises deliverance- Vs:8- "The Lord saved me from death, he stopped my tears and kept me from defeat." Yes, it will take time to make progress through the journey but God is with us in every step of that process and He will deliver us. We will have to experience some depression in all likelihood, but not total defeat.
The one phrase I hear again and again from Christian people who grieve is: "I don’t how people go through this without the Lord. I don’t know how people go through this without the church and Christian friends." "It hurts," they say, "but I’m am so comforted by God’s promises." That’s a huge difference. Christian’s have hope, something better is coming. 1 Peter 1:6, in talking about our reward, says- "In this you greatly rejoice, (the knowledge of heaven) though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials."(NIV)
Please understand, the grief, no matter how hard, is temporary. There is going to come a time when there will be no more sorrow, no more death. In Ripley’s Believe It or Not in Gatlinburg, TN, they have famous tombstones with unique epitaphs. I have been told there is this one from Watumca, Ala., obviously believed in someplace better: "Here lies Solomon Peas. Peas is not here, only the pod. Peas shelled out and went home to God." That’s funny, but it’s not all that far from what Jesus said in John 11:25-26, “Those who believe in me, even though they die like everyone else, will live again. 26They are given eternal life for believing in me and will never perish." In other words, those who have a relationship with Jesus will be able to shed off this pod and go to be with Him..
In the late 1800’s Horatio G. Spafford, a Christian lawyer from Chicago, experienced the death of his infant son. Within weeks of that devastating loss came the infamous Chicago fire of 1871, which destroyed all his real estate holdings that he had on the shores of Lake Michigan, leaving him almost desolate. In 1873 Spafford, with the help of a friend, planned a trip to Europe, to just get away for a few weeks. And so, on Nov. 19 he placed his wife and four daughters on a luxury liner headed for France. Spafford was going to join them in about a week, after he took care of some urgent business. But on Nov. 21, 1873, the ship the Spafford’s family was on collided with another vessel and within 12 minutes, sank in the northern Atlantic. In the chaotic moments after the collision, all four daughters were swept away from Mrs. Spafford. She was knocked unconscious but was somehow rescued as one of the few survivors. Back in Chicago, Horatio, heard of the accident and waited anxiously for news about his family. Finally, ten days later, a telegram came to his home, sent from his wife, who was in the hospital. The telegram contained just two words: "Saved - Alone." He knew that he had lost all four of his girls. Horatio Spafford was devastated. He began to shake uncontrollably and was comforted by his best friend and neighbor, Major Whittle.
With Whittle’s help Horatio Spafford, took a ship to France, to meet his wife and bring her home. On the journey he asked the captain to wake him in the middle of the night when they came to the approximate location of the accident. The captain did and as Horatio Spafford looked down in those cold, dark waters, which covered up his four girls, he wept unashamedly. And then he went to his cabin and penned the words to what has become one of our most famous hymns. "When peace like a river, attendeth my way, When sorrows like sea billows roll- Whatever my lot, Thou has taught me to say, It is well, it is well with my soul." Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come, Let this blest assurance control, That Christ hath regarded my helpless estate and hath shed His own blood for my soul." The only way that Horatio Spafford could hold on to his faith in midst of devastating grief, was to put his absolute faith in Jesus Christ. That’s the only way you’ll hold up too. Trust Him and you’ll learn like the Psalmist, that God will listen and help. And then you can say as he did in vs:7- "Be confident my heart, because the Lord has been good to me." And know, no matter what, “It is well, with my soul.”
In Christ,
Brown

Some updates:

Some one has said " Every addict is some one's beloved". In a deeper way every one who is sick is some ones' beloved". Pray for the following:

Ryan K ,who is in hospice care.
LA, for total healing
JB who will be going for drug rehabilitation
GD, who is battling chronic depression
Don Harbecke, 52 years old is had a quadruple heart bypass yesterday in Illinois,.
He came through the surgery well. Praise the Lord.
Jack B, experiencing heart problems,
Leslie Broughton, in the intensive care
Larry, Jane, and family who just moved to their dream house. Larry is concerned that he might lose his job in Atlanta
Geraldine who is hospitalized in with a heart attack and a stroke in Columbia, SC.
JN, who is a recent college graduate, looking for job,
Janice, our oldest daughter, who is going back to work next week, after the birth of Simeon. She works for Healthcare for the Homeless in Boston,
Our youngest daughter Jessica, who will be finishing her assignment withe the Americorps in Philadlphia in few weeks,
Sunita who is attending a weeklong conference in Haiti,
Pray for Cameron Tyler, born 8 weeks prematurely, weighing 4 pounds, in neonatal ICU in Boston
Pray for Kristin, Becky, Shannan - our young expecting moms
Jane Leoffler, who has been admitted to the hospital with multiple complications. She and her husband Charles have been married for 65 years. WOW!
Andy, who is going for surgery today in Sloane-Kettering Hospital in New York City.
Kim, a young mom had an emergency appendectomy yesterday
Brolin Parker... As he recovers from surgery in Albany last week.
Burt Sweet (Retired Pastor) is still recovering from lung surgery in Watertown, NY. Please pray for Burt and his family as his health continues to be fragile.
Geno DeAngelo, Binghamton Police officer, father of four children, battling lung cancer,

Praise the Lord for those who have gone to be with Jesus, having loved him on earth.
Betty Slade in KS.
My uncle Mamdu Naik in India. He was a staunch Hindu, who accepted the Lord a few years ago. He was baptized last year. He died last week at the age of 85. He was the husband of my mom's oldest sister. They were blessed with 6 children. All of their children except one son love the Lord and are serving Him. The Lord has blessed the entire family. One of the grandsons is an evangelist and a pastor. He was formerly an insurance company executive. He left a very lucrative position to serve the Lord in full time ministry. The Lord is using him in a spectacular way. Over two hundred people have come to Christ from a very staunch Hindu families through his ministry. The Lord is doing some amazing things in India. The church is exploding like wildfire.

Jude 1:24 -
Now unto Him that is able to keep you from falling, and to present you faultless before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy,

Jude 1:25 -
To the only wise God our Saviour, be glory and majesty, dominion and power, both now and ever. Amen.

"God, grant me the Serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the Courage to change the one I can, and the Wisdom to know it's me."

The next time you feel like GOD can't use you, just remember...

Noah was a drunk

Abraham was too old

Isaac was a daydreamer

Jacob was a liar

Leah was ugly

Joseph was abused

Moses had a stuttering problem

Gideon was afraid

Samson had long hair and was a womanizer, Rahab was a prostitute, Jeremiah and Timothy were too young, David had an affair and was a murderer, Elijah was suicidal, Isaiah preached naked, Jonah ran from God, Naomi was a widow, Job went bankrupt, John the Baptist ate bugs, Peter denied Christ, The Disciples fell asleep while praying, Martha worried about everything, The Samaritan woman was divorced, more than once Zaccheus was too small, Paul was too religious, Timothy had an ulcer...AND Lazarus was dead!

No more excuses now. God can use you to your full potential.

Besides you aren't the message, you are just the messenger!